This season, I feel completely uncreative, gift-wise. I try to think of really fun, original presents every year for the people I love and usually I'm successful. But this year? I think my brain flatlined. Maybe it's the lack of stimulus since I finished college. Maybe it's the constant stress of bills and the "real world." Maybe it's because I haven't done as much writing and scrapping as I'd done in the past, therefore I haven't exercised my creative muscle. Whatever it is, I'm blanking.
The one present that'll kick ass is the Disney World scrapbook for my mom. And that'll be fabulous if only because mom will appreciate it even if it looks like crap. Which it won't because I just shelled out nearly $50 for pictures for it. What started out as a cheap idea for a present has now morphed into a monster of a project complete with to-do lists, to-get papers and accessories and a migraine to match. Ugh.
And the other present that I was all pumped about was Joe's. I had the perfect gift ordered for him through Amazon last week. I ordered it with another book. The book for me came in a few days ago, yet no sign of Joe's gift. Tonight I got an email saying that they were out of stock and returning my money. DAMMIT!!! I was so pumped to get my hands on the book for him and surprise him and now I'm back to square one. It's not easy shopping for a gay man. Especially one who buys everything he likes the second he spots it. I should just go down to Detroit for a visit and buy him dinner. My presence could be present enough. Hmmm...
In other news, I'm incredibly homesick. While doing the scrapbook for my mom, I keep looking at the pictures of my family. It's going to suck only going home for two days instead of two or three weeks. I miss my mom a lot. More than I have in a long time, really. I just want her to hug me and show me the cookies she's baking and see her run around the kitchen like a possessed woman as she attempts to finish off her latest baking project. Christmas eve can't come soon enough.
Lately I've been feeling this overwhelming sense of anticipation and longing. Like something is coming and it's going to be huge. Not, like, coming-of-Christ huge, but life-altering big. I've dubbed 2006 to be the year of change. While I'm scared of what that change could be, I'm more scared to just stay in the same place. I sound like a crazy gypsy fortune-teller or something. But I can't ignore the pit in my stomach and the slight tickle at the back of my throat. It's not a cold, it's my version of woman's intuition. The worst part is waiting. A patient girl I am not. I wish I could just fast forward and see what will happen and then continue on with life. Peace of mind would be a good thing right now. On so many levels.
Ciao, dahling!
~*Krissy*~