- danced around singing to the Wicked soundtrack, acting like my life is a charmed musical...in front of a hundred or more patrons of an elegant fundraiser (it wasn't my fault! It was my favorite song from the play! And I was egged on by a very cute gay man or two who pulled me to the dance floor!)
- twirled and squealed "WHEEE!!!" while dancing to above-stated soundtrack
- announced something above my non-existant sex-life to a lesbian...and the fifty people around her because the music decided to stop at that very moment
- fell up some stairs--but didn't spill my long island iced tea!
- figured that I should continue to drink after I was good and drunk because it was for a good cause. I was drinking for charity dammit!
- threatened a drag queen's life if he didn't bring me a drink STAT. (It was Joe--I figured it was ok. It probably wasn't because the words "rip" and "balls" were used in the same sentence.)
- made friends with a few lesbians. And then loudly announced that I had some new lesbian friends to my new gay boyfriends.
- proclaimed that the president of the organization that the party was for to be "the shit!" and then gave him a hug, when he'd met me for maybe two seconds before that night.
- contemplated a proposition from a girl for two seconds...before I realized that I was drunk. And straight. (Much to her dismay.)
- screamed in a lesbian bar "I'm the cutest one here!!!" after realizing I was the only girl in there who'd heard of lipgloss, cute purses or pomade.
- called my good friends "nazi terrors who must hate me" because they wouldn't let me drunk dial my crush and then didn't talk to them for ten minutes but instead sang loudly to the radio to annoy them and get back at them.
- posed for a photo shoot in the caverns of a five-star restaurant/mansion thing because I felt pretty and drunk. And pretty drunk. As did the new friends who posed with me.
- drunk dialed my mother. And left quite the charming message involving shrieking, squealing and many "I love you!!"s.
- licked a Playdoh penis or two. For a Kodak moment or two. (Note to self: hide those pictures in case I'm ever famous or running for office....)
- won the "let's spit on a hissy mama goose" contest by horking a loogie on top of her head. (We were on a balcony. And so drunk off of champagne. I swear I love animals when they're not hissing at me!)

I don't think I will be heavily drinking for a long time. Unless it's for a charity event or bachelorette party, that is. Wink.

Ciao, dahling!

~*Krissy*~

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