I have failed at the personality test.
Me! The person that people call a "bright spot in their day!" The one with "endless energy" and "sunshine to spare!" Yes, me. I failed that flippin' personality test.
In my attempt to find a not-hourly-I-want-benefits-dammit job, I went to a staffing agency today. When I arrived with the required resume and forms of identification, I was informed that there was testing to do.
Gulp.
Testing: where I'd find out that I suck at typing, any skills I had would fly out the window with the click of a mouse and I'd have to answer some bogus touchy-feely questions. Or so I thought.
Amazingly, I passed all of the computer application tests easily. Even the damn mental math questions weren't so bad. I remembered more than I thought with the Excel test and I discovered I can type a speedy 75 words a minute.
However.
My personality test was in the seventh percentile. SEVENTH PERCENTILE.
"Do you not like working in an office? Or with people?" The staffing woman looked confused. She'd known me for all of two minutes and she could tell the test was wrong. Innately, I knew she knew I was Mary fuckin' Sunshine in person.
"Nooo! No! I like people! I have a communications degree! I want to help people! I want to excel! I have goals! I LIKE PEOPLE!!!"
"That's not what the results say."
"Um...they must be wrong then?"
The worker smiled a tight smile. She'd probably heard that a million and one times before. But she lead me back to the testing room and reset the test for me.
The second time around I read the questions slowly. And. Carefully. There was no way the man was going to fool me! If I'd fucked up because I had clicked too fast or answered too soon, then I'd remedy that stat. I have a fantastic personality and a good work ethic. The stupid test just didn't know it.
As I clicked the final answers I smiled a little smugly. Now
the world and the staffing agency would know that I'm A-1 Super-girl--with super personality to boot! I returned to the woman's desk.
"You've improved!"
I smiled. I knew I would.
"Your score jumped to the thirty-eighth percentile. It's an...improvement. But nowhere near the average."
I failed? I failed. And in a spectacular sense as well. Not only did I not even score average, I scored so far below average that if I were to get a grade, it wouldn't be an F it'd be a J or a K.
J. Or K. JK--kind of like "just kidding." Like God is louging on his golden chaise in the sky laughing at me because this is a joke. A great big cosmic joke. This may be the heavens' way of knocking me down a peg or two. Which is fine--a big head doesn't go with any of my outfits, anway. But if this little joke ends up not landing me a job, the seraphin and I may just have to have a few words.
Ciao, dahling!
~*Krissy*~